Changes, or, Meditation

Or both.

Last week I started a new job, one that I hope will bring new opportunities.

Also, since we last spoke I went camping with Lover + kids, to a sober music festival, watched a meteor shower from inside a hatchback in a cornfield, went boating, started regularly attending a womens meeting, and baked copious amounts of goods.

I also did my best to be helpful when someone needed it.

To be more specific, Lover and I were invited to his friends house for dinner last night. The friend and his girlfriend have kids, our kids play together sometimes and we’ve gone there before. However, this friend recently started, and stopped drinking.

So, we go over there, and things were…not quite right when we got there. Turns out, hes drinking still, his girlfriend is avoiding him and us while trying to watch their kids, dinner was way off kilter. I was feeling anxious about the whole thing, and we were about to leave when suddenly his friend leaves the house, (“oh hey guys, I’m just going to go for a walk”). As soon as he leaves, the girlfriend starts telling us all the problems. Lover goes after his friend, and I hang back to talk and help the girlfriend where I can. Shes fed up with the drinking. Wants him to leave or get sober but she is a stay at home mom and has nowhere to go, the house is in his name.

And I dont know what to say.

She knows I’m sober, and shes looking at me, asking me what to do and I have no clue what to tell her. I feel like I’m supposed to know something and give her sage advice but I’m drawing a blank and I dont want to say the wrong thing.

So I help her clean her house after the kids ran roughshod, and eventually Lover comes back and we leave. I feel like helping her clean was the right move, but I feel unfinished, like I should know something to tell her. Its bothering me.

So after writing, I’m going to go read the al anon daily meditation books I have, and give it to the man upstairs.

1. Got to sleep in today! Perk of the new job being closer. More snuggles with Lover as a lovely result.

2. A packed lunch for me, by the aforementioned Lover. It was Turkey and spinach and love.

3. I’m learning parts of my new job, this pleases me.

4. Went to the womens meeting tonight, the topic was step 11 and it was perfect.

5. Sat down with carrots and hummus for dinner, while writing this post. I’ve missed blogging, and didnt realize how much until I began to write tonight.

💙